hey guys! Ive finally decided that I am gonna tell my best friend that I am gay. I wouldnt call him my bestest friend but he is a very very very good friend of mine. I find that he has a lot in common with me. I always talk to him at school and he said that he is not homophobic and doesnt really mind if one of his friends is gay. So I've decided to tell him. But I dont know when and how. at school? When? how do I say it to him? I really admire him and I want to have a lifetime long friendship with him. so I'll need the best advice on this! Thanks!
The way I used to do it was that I'd pull to one side when we're together and say "Hey, I got something to tell you, hope you don't mind, but I'm gay. I'm hoping that we can still be friends, cos I consider you a good friend" Hope that helps. As to where...can't really help you...Perhaps when he's over your place or whatnot...Just make sure you have some time afterwards in case he has some questions
Or you can try another approach... which is a bit more subtle but worked for me. Have you ever liked someone but couldn't figure out why? And take it from there...
Good luck Tyce! Never know, he might be bi/gay himself. at school? When? - Recess/Lunch how do I say it to him? - If hes eating an apple or something say, "hey eating fruit doesn't make you one, you're born like it just like I was". Ok maybe not. XD
I am having a similar problem. I have chosen to tell my best friend this weekend when I see him. As far as how or where, I would say definitly not at school. Its too easy for things to get out. Last week I was writing a note about the guy I like to my friend, and someone snatched it out of my hand. We tackled her haha. As far as how, I have found it easy to just kind of blurt it out, in fact I find that to be one of the only ways I can do it, because I am a wuss. I hope that my advice and semi-funny story can help :icon_bigg
When I came out to my friends I didn't tell them at school because things have habbits of spreading there so I allways told em by meeting up with them useually Saturdays because that gives them time to think about it before Monday. I'd allways try and steer it towards a general canversation where it could come up, for instance I tried steering towards conversations where my friend(s) would start talkin bout girls then ask who I fancied where I'd then tell em but different people find it easier in different ways
Personally, when coming out to my best friend, I thought it would be best to do it by pulling him aside when with one or two other friends. That way it's easy to have some privacy, if it's awkward after you tell him then you can both just go back to the other friend/s and it's also easy for him to pull you aside later on if there are any questions. Turns out it didn't quite work out like that for me.... but i hope it goes well for you!
With JWAD I think sometimes it can be a good idea not to come out at school - not least because you might be able to better control whether or not you get interrupted, and just in case he is really shocked and needs a bit of time to recover. But if you think he would keep quiet, and not make a scene at all, then I would pull him aside or something. I would wait until the two of you are alone together walking somewhere - with a bit of time on your hands (ie, not just before a class or something). And I'd just come straight out with it (if you are able), with perhaps a few sentences leading him in. I've only ever actually come out a couple of times in person whilst sober so I'm not the best for advice actually!! I usually opt for email, because then I can mull it over. - But the major drawback with this is that, should it come to it, whilst you can deny a conversation took place, if your friend does turn nasty (which it sounds he won't), if there's an email they can forward it to people etc.
I've decided to tell him on the holidays. So that we can just have some alone time for a while, so that he can understand me. Ive already like given him a clue about it - I said to him if I told him something and it could completely shock him or not cause him any effect, would he tell anyone? He said 'I promise I won't tell a soul and I would respect you and not see you differently, I'll still be your friend' I felt so happy but I think he kinda knows now that I'm gay, I mean, its obvious from the question, right?