The Trevor Project (Teen Suicide)

It's scary how specifically CORRECT the suicidal signs page is..

"Expression of a lack of future orientation: “It won‘t matter soon anyway.”

 

Suicide is very real to me- I lost one sort-of friend to suicide and almost lost my best friend.
He had a very bad case of depression (the honest, clinical kind- he became in insomniac, had nightmares when he slept, cried daily, suffered panic attacks, etc) due to physical/emotional/mental abuse through his childhood and the only person who he ever felt cared about him (his sister) commited suicide. Basically, he tried to kill himself about 10 years ago (he's older than me) when he was 16 and couldn't go through with it.
Last year, he would say things like "would you miss me if I was gone?" and "Would you come to my funeral if I died?" but it didn't scare me that much. Later, he started saying things like "You wouldn't miss me, no one would" and "No one would bother coming to my funeral anyway. They wouldn't even have people to carry my casket." These remarks bothered me immensely. I never thought he was suicidal until I started having nightmares about his suicide. I brought it up to his girlfriend and she put me through to him, and he told me he was cutting himself. He was very depressed by this point, to where he wouldn't even want to get out of bed in the morning. One day he woke up and couldn't control his crying, so he decided to cut down to his arteries. (He cut on his upper thigh, on the inside.) He wrote his notes, laid down in bed and prepared to bleed to death. Luckily, his fiance called him (they did not live together and he'd been fighting with her). He began to say goodbye, but she didn't want to let him go that easily. She called his friend (he lived in a different state) and the friend went to his house to stop him. Luckily, he hadn't yet gone deep enough to die. He wasn't hospitalized,but he was in and out of sleep for a few days. After that,he stopped cutting but still battled his depression and expressed it by starving himself. That didn't last long, because his fiance and i made him get help. Now he's on an anti-depressant and is living much happier. He still has his moments, but he's doing much better.
I'm typing this up, so that if anyone out there feels the way he did, you know help is out there, and you know you're not alone. It still brings tears to my eyes to think of how close I was to losing my best friend, and it's been very hard to write this. PLEASE don't make the people who love you go through this...even if you don't feel their love right now.

 

Note:
Those who have been following Rain33's story (initially posted in this thread) - this discussion has been moved to a separate, new, thread here:
http://emptyclosets.com/forum/showthread.php?t=963

 

Kids Help Phone
Anonymous, free and confidential 24/7 counselling.

www.kidshelpphone.ca
or
1 800 668 6868​

As a KidsHelpPhone Ambassador i strongly encourage that no matter what the issue or it's gravity you try this hotline. No issue is too big or small. Weither it's a life or death issue or a shoulder to cry on after a bad day, they are here to help, not judge.

 

What's kid's help phone like??? sometimes, I get really needing something like that. But it's not like I'm going to kill myself, just cry and break stuff... There's just times when I get so worked up... or just need to talk.

Could a 16 year old really call just to get a little help and cool down from a crazy mood? I guess I just feel like I don't deserve it.. like theres kids out there who are in way worse shape than me, who I might be stealing the Kid's Help Phone employees away from.

 

Tired, in no way is your call less important to the staff at KidsHelpPhone, in fact the majority of their calls aren't of life threatening nature but from broken hearts and bad days. I would strongly encourage you that next time you are feeling down to give them a call. If you still feel uncomfortable calling them than you always have us. But i assure you talking with a real live person is much more gratifying than a computer screen.

And Paul, i think there is also a suicide hotline in Canada too. I'll have a look for that today.

 

awesome! thanks guys, I really think I will call them next time I need it.

Has anyone here ever called before? What's it like?

 

Yes. I have myself.
They were really understanding...and although some of them are more passive than the rest....if you get a counsellor you don't like, tell them....say "i'd feel more comfortable with another counceller nothing personal" or for example if you got a female and would prefer a male...for any reason at all really...they're there to make you feel comfortable and if you can't talk to them openly then there's no sense in you calling...what i mean by that is....get a counseller that you feel comfortable with, they won't be offended granted you are polite.

I've heard of only one occaision that someone called and felt as if the counseller wasn't paying attention, and thats in three years out of 500 calls i know of...so 1:500 is a really good acceptance ratio. In this senario, if you find the counseller to be judgemental or irresponsive etc. then simply hang up....it's that easy. Please do, these people were trained to know better, maybe the counseller is having a bad day or one bad apple got through either way, as an Ambassador, this behaviour by the phone counsellers is unacceptable, hang up and call back until you receive a different counseller.

The Golden Rule never get discouraged. And i'll leave it at that.

 

Wow, thanks proud!

I will definitely call the kids help phone next time I'm needing it. Hopefully that's not too soon:icon_wink

 

Haha, anytime, just doing my job .

And yes, hopefully not.

But, again, sticking with what should be said, feeling down isn't all negative. We all have down times and we shouldn't look at them as something to avoid. Pain makes us appreciate the sanctity of joy. After all we only find the star that leads us to our destiny, in the dead of darkness.

Anyway on a less serious note....i'm baking a chocolate & strawberry pie so, cheerio!!

 

Anyone ever thinking about suicide should seriously call that hotline. A few years ago when I just couldn't take it I called and talking to the guy there just really cleared my head. I wasn't even thinking about suicide so much as just not wanting to exist (maybe I'm just weird but it's not the same thing to me) They're really nice and supportive people. I'm always telling friends to call and a lot of them have said the same thing about it.

 

At the beginning of this past year, my friend Amanda tried to kill herself.
She's been fighting with just about everything since then. Her mother is an abusive alcoholic, and her father calls every now and then to tell her how worthless she is.
She's gone through both bulimia and anorexia so that she would feel pretty.
She was obsessed with a guy at school, who as bad as he felt for her, simply didn't feel the same way. She was really hard on herself for it, and she cried a lot.
She used to cut herself a lot, and she pierces her ears and just about any other body part you can stick a safety pin through, she even pierced a scar on her leg in class once.
She went to therapy, and came out with nothing but a prescription for an anti-depressant that made her feel even worse than before.
On the night that she tried to kill herself, she was talking to me on msn. She told me that she had overdosed, and then got drunk and I knew immediately that she was in trouble. Alcahol and pills don't mix. Afterwards, she also cut her wrists. She started crying and telling me how afraid she was and that she didn't want to die alone.
I have never been more afraid in my life.
When she was released from the hospital, she was temporarily committed to a psych ward, and was later released into the custody of her father. She had to start going to a new school, which she soon got kicked out of for throwing a chair at a boy who was hitting on her.
I remember she showed up at my house shortly after, and we just stood outside in the snow hugging for ten minutes or more.
She's been doing better, or at least on the outside she has been. She has a boyfriend now, who she loves, and who she may be moving in with soon. I'll miss having her at school, because she was so fun and so amazing, but I'll be glad to see her get away from her mother.
Anyway, sorry I didn't mean for this to be so long. >.<

 

It's so good for her that your such a great friend . I have had depression for years and have tried killing myself , i am on medication now that helps , some others i tried made me feel weird . I have my good and my bad days like everyone else , but it does help to talk with friends on those bad day's .

In australia some good places to check out are

http://www.glwa.org.au/

http://www.lifeline.org.au/ 13 11 14

http://www.kidshelp.com.au/ 1800 551 800

http://www.reachout.com.au/

http://www.beyondblue.org.au/

Hope this helps

 

I have actually lived through several suicide attempts. I was 12 to 13 at the time. And that feeling is indescribable. I guess I could say it is sort of like being at the arse end of the world at the end of your wits with the feeling of doom over your head. Or being thrown into the bottom of a barrel head first and landing on spikes. The kind of spikes you throw your enemies on to in Mortal Kombat.

Which is what it is. Mortal Kombat. Only internal.

Actually speaking of on the phone or online counselors I actually seriously contemplated becoming one. I mean I do that sort of thing for online friends anyway. And me being me, I find it is something that helps me in the sense that I just helped someone else with something important.

 

i actually saw something like that in the movie "Mambo Italiano" that was a good movie about a gay man, had bad choices in men tho...
ive also thought about suicide actually ive been thinking about it increasingly the idea seems good but i dont have a good enough motive i know there are other ways of dealing

 

Suicide is never the answer. Some wise one here at EC said it's a "permanent solution to a temporary problem". All problems are temporary. I see this is your first post. Welcome to EC. I hope you can make some friends here and talk about what is bothering you so we can help you.

 

well, whats the number?