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Dealing With Crushes

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Grantious, Feb 16, 2008.

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  1. Grantious

    Grantious
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    Hey Guys,

    Crushes most people get them.... EVERYBODY HATES THEM... but how to deal with them?

    Now before i say anything of consequence this is from my personal experience and probobly wont work for everyone! Like some of you know i had been dealing with a major crush and i finally have gotten over him and i'd like to share what worked for me.

    1.Boredom)
    I once read that most crushes are developed because a person is bored.. This is definatly not the case for everyone but... that said i was for sure in that catagory. I was bored out of my mind and this "Crush" or "Love" was as exciteing as it was painful, So what i did was try and add some spice to my life, I'd organise a HELL of a lot more day's out with friends, Not only did it make my life less boring it took a LOT of focus from my crush. Even if for a while at first.

    2.Self-esteem)
    Now from extreamly personal experience crushes can take a massive toll on your self-esteem, I don't know why it works that way it just does! So what i did was get a hair cut.. Even a colour like i've been raving about for a while and got a lot of new clothes. Not only did i think less of my crush i feel a hell of a lot bigger! :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes: and complement fishing is cool too... He He He :icon_bigg :icon_bigg

    3.Connections)
    This one wont work in every situation but meeting some new gay people actually helped me quite a bit and i don't mean for a relationships but having gay friends can make you feel more open and less bottled up but also coming out to more people can help a lot too!!!

    4. Confide in friends and family)
    Having close friends and family that you can tell everything can be a major help! Even if its just someone to cry with.

    5 and 6...) Are my least favorite ones but in most cases they can make all the diffrence..
    Four would be finding someone new to focus on, Preferably someone who likes you back because if you focus on a new crush it'll eventually develop into another painfull experience that you will regret later on!

    OK Six!! everyone is going to HATE ME after reading this one... TIME Now every crush WILL fade in time, Ok it might not seem like it but it will happen, I never belived it when I first read this answer but its 100% True
    "Time Heals all wounds" and that includes crushes!

    All this stuff i've listed helped me with my crush... but not only my crush life seems soo much better

    Now this is in my experience like i said before... But from experience comes wisdom so i REALLY hope this helps some people.

    Catch Ya!
    (&&&) Love ya's (&&&)
     
    #1 Grantious, Feb 16, 2008
  2. josephaustin92

    josephaustin92
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    Perfect Advice !!!!!!
     
    #2 josephaustin92, Feb 16, 2008
  3. Wolfbane

    Wolfbane
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    *hugs you like crazy style* I'll definitely put some of these to good use....ty again
     
    #3 Wolfbane, Feb 16, 2008
  4. Stevie J

    Stevie J
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    i have used some of these and they've worked! i'll have to tryout the rest to get this crush out of my head for good.
     
    #4 Stevie J, Feb 16, 2008
  5. mostashio

    mostashio
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    might have to give this a go!
     
    #5 mostashio, Feb 16, 2008
  6. Grantious

    Grantious
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    I'm glad i actually helped some ppl
    i was just wrighting what i was thinking
     
    #6 Grantious, Feb 17, 2008
  7. Paul_UK

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    The best advise often comes from people who have been there before. :thumbsup:

    I will make this sticky for now too.
     
    #7 Paul_UK, Feb 17, 2008
  8. Grantious

    Grantious
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    oh nice
    thanking ya
    *blush
     
    #8 Grantious, Feb 18, 2008
  9. Rizpaz

    Rizpaz
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    I'll have to try that stuff out... Thanks!
     
    #9 Rizpaz, Feb 18, 2008
  10. Nicolio

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    I think all the crushes I've ever had were kinda creeped out by me in some form or another...Maybe I'm obvious about it... I dunno. And with the person I like now, I'm thinking maybe that person is psychic and can read minds, I don't know why but I really believe so... And I get nervous when around that person, cause I'm afraid ther gonna know what i'm thinking, and my thoughts are often sexually based...

    It's great advice you have, I should really try to get a life... Sounds kind of hard though, I usually just keep to myself... But thankyou, I've been needing advice! There isn't anybody I can talk to about this stuff, so this really is something to help get started on getting mind off certain people. I'm going to try to find something other to do that doesn't involve thinking of the person I like. Cause now that you mention it, I am extremely bored with life!

    Thanks for making me realise. :wink:
     
    #10 Nicolio, Feb 20, 2008
  11. Psychedelic Bookmarks

    Psychedelic Bookmarks
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    great advice! i would add

    #7 concentrating on your crushes' weaknesses. :grin: if you have any photos of them looking like dorks, or memories of them being jerks, it really shatters any illusions...

    apart from that, all your points are perfect!
     
    #11 Psychedelic Bookmarks, Feb 21, 2008
  12. JWAD

    JWAD Guest

    tons of thanks for this I've allready used it and it's really helped, there are tons of hot guys at my school but everyone of them is straight=( so this has really helped thnx
     
    #12 JWAD, Feb 21, 2008
  13. Grantious

    Grantious
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    I agree that is really good advice
     
    #13 Grantious, Feb 21, 2008
  14. acorn7

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    Wow, I can so relate to everything you say... and yeah, the "remember, he's a jerk" does help quite a bit, at least as first.

    About the fact your self-esteem goes down: my theory is that the crush you have on him is also a desire to be like him, to be as good as him. When I had crushes on girls, my self-esteem was fine, because I liked the opposite, something I couldn't and didn't want to become. With a crush on a guy, it's like desire, love & jealousy rolled into one (for me at least). And the further your self-esteem goes down, the harder it is to actually kick yourself in the butt and do something about it.
     
    #14 acorn7, Feb 22, 2008
  15. airaction

    airaction
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    I Have Developed a crush on a man and i think that your points would help me
    but i do get a lot back from this man but i will give them a try
    Cheers Airaction
     
    #15 airaction, Feb 24, 2008
  16. ccdd

    ccdd Guest

    I second that! Definately the best way to go - I have a habit of idolising people, even though, as we know, no one is actually perfect, as much as I might think them to be!!
     
    #16 ccdd, Feb 24, 2008
  17. Hepcat

    Hepcat
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    Thank for this advice, I barely survived the first crush I had, and so I think this could really help me in future. Thanks.
     
    #17 Hepcat, Feb 27, 2008
  18. Chamber of Life

    Chamber of Life
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    I actually used some of these but the other I never thought twice about. I do have my eyes on some one and your just helped me out. THANK!!
     
    #18 Chamber of Life, Feb 27, 2008
  19. Grof142007

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    #8 Remember he/she is Straight and Unavailable

    This is get me through most of my crush that and time
     
    #19 Grof142007, Feb 27, 2008
  20. Several

    Several
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    I can sooo relate to what you just said. I had a huge crush on the guy and at the same time I envied him. It's weird, i know:stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
    #20 Several, Mar 16, 2008
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