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genderfluid or demiboy??

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by spacecase, May 23, 2017.

  1. spacecase

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    Hi so, the past 3 or so have been quite a wild ride in terms of my sexuality and gender. Only recently ( i wanna say about 2016 December or around 2017 January-ish?? i think so) ive been having some struggles with my gender identity. Through my whole life, ive been a tomboy up until now. I've ben identifyng as genderfluid for maybe 3-4 months or so and ive been comfortable with it.

    Now within the past few days ive been thinking more about it and think im maybe a demiboy? im not a 100% yet, but thats what im leaning towards right now.

    So, most of the time i feel kinda in a mix of male and neither female nor male. Some days I feel more neuteral, and some days I feel really male (albiet it be fewer with the latter). Im not completely sure if i would fall into the category of demiboy or genderflux male.

    Do you have any advice and/or answers for me? Thank you!:king:
     
  2. EverDeer

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    Hey! I actually really relate to this, I was assigned female at birth, and most of the time I feel really agender or neither male nor female. However, there are days where if I had to pick one side or the other, I would pick being referred to as a boy simply because it seems like the better alternative of the binary, and I feel more connected to masculinity and being referred to as a boy, etc. I have also used the terms demiboy, agender, and genderflux to describe myself in the past, and another one that I actually feel fits the description pretty well is demiflux, which is how I'd mostly try and define my floating between demiboy and agender.

    Anyway! Labels are honestly whatever you'd like though. I'm sure there are some people that only shift very slightly like you or I that use genderfluid because they feel that's the best descriptor, but I mostly just use nonbinary or agender because it seems to be the simplest and broadest to explain. Transmasculine is also a title I've heard some people use before to describe how they might be trans and more attatched to the male or masculine part of the gender spectrum, but don't feel entirely like a man.

    One thing that I did to determine my feelings early on was I had a daily log or journal, and each day throughout the day I would write down if I was feeling more masculine or feminine, both or neither, and was more comfortable being addressed as a boy or a girl, or had no preference, or if I was feeling dysphoria or not, etc. I often found it mostly came down to I either just didn't care but didn't feel any attachment to being addressed as a man or woman, or, sometimes I think I just end up going towards the "boy" side when I'm dysphoric because I'm sick of people always assuming/addressing me as a girl, and because I present in a more masculine way and relate to masculine gender roles easier.

    Anywho, good luck to you! Use whatever is comfy and don't be afraid if you like to / need to use multiple labels. I see labels as less of apart of my direct identity, and more just descriptors that make it easier to describe my experience to people who don't know.
     
  3. Eveline

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    Honestly, you sound as if you are a trans man or transmasculine, everyone feels at times less connected to their gender and trans people have a tendency to experience fluctuations in their feeling of connectiveness because gender dysphoria forces you to escape and disconnect after a while. However, I do agree with Kipper, it is really up to you and whatever label you feel most comfortable with.