Hey! So first of all, I hope everyone is having a good day. I wanted to create a space where we can talk about the struggles of being plus size and trans or questioning or queer in general. If this isn't the best place for this post let me know! Im new so i'm still figuring this out! I don't know exactly how to start this but I am having the hardest time with my weight. I have a history of anorexia, which I am currently in recovery from(thank god), but I have both body dysmorphia and gender dysphoria and recently gained a lot of weight due to my bi-polar medication. I am the most happy and stable I have ever been, but this weight is still bothering me. I used to wear all men's clothes but now have to wear women's pants because I don't fit in mens, and no mens shirts fit right because they are all huge in the arms and shoulders if they are xl but still small by the hips. I hate it. And I don't have anyone in my life I can really talk to about it since i'm not out as gender questioning. I can't lose weight because there is a high chance of me relapsing, I can't change the meds that make me gain weight because they are the only ones that actually work for me, I can't wear women's clothes because it makes the dysphoria worse, I can't go on T (which is something I've been thinking about) because I am not out, I just feel so frustrated. Add on top of that that I accidentally put my binder in the dryer and now it is causing chest pain...:bang: I'm thankful that I am pretty flat chested but I still never leave the house without my binder and now it hurts and I don't have money for another one. Okay, vent over! Any tips from any other plus size people out there? What are your experiences? Anything that helps you all? Why are all women's plus size clothing so feminine? Why are androgynous clothes so expensive (looking at you Wildfang)? Why can't society just get it together?! Why is the queer community (specifically lesbian community is what im familiar with) so stuck on the idea of thin androgyny!? To everyone out there, you are incredible, worthy of happiness, and truly an inspiration for continuing to fight in such hard times. Stay strong everyone!
I'm a more petite-sized queer, but I just wanted to respond. I know how tough it is for you lovely people to find clothing that fits appropriately. I have the exact same problems, on the opposite side of the weight and height spectrum. Sometimes you can tweak clothing to suit your needs. I cut the sleeves off feminine shirts and voila. I look more masculine. Own your clothes, own your body, but mostly own yourself and know that your clothes don't define you and your weight doesn't define you. Due to my height and my desire to not start hormones, I will never pass for a man (but I still look great in leather).
Clothing can be annoying when plus sized or trans... my advice is to try to find gender neutral clothes ... so solid colored shirts with less frills. Plainer jeans maybe? Colored T -shirts for me are the best... even if they are more fem in style you can find them in masculine cut or neutral cuts... usually they are saying t-shirts or the like
There are some clothing lines specifically for plus size people. I don't know the names of them, sorry, but a google search and you might find them. If you don't like what's on there presently, they do have seasons so check back when the new one is. And as to why society can't cater to it. Society wants to make money, so they make things and target it to where there is going to be more money. If there's not a lot of people in a specific group, then there won't be a lot of options because people (in the businesses) don't think there will be a lot of money in it. On the plus side, might be an opportunity for you to make your own line. Since it's more unique and you have a story to go along with it, you might be able to sell well.
