Going to a gay support group tomorrow

Hi likethewind (what a lovely nickname by the way),

well done on making the effort, and taking the initiative! I'm planning to do a similar thing myself, as soon as family (well, ex-family) responsibilities allow.

Yes I send some *good thoughts* your way...and don't worry, if you feel nervous at all, remember that most probably everyone else in the group would be feeling that, too! People usually put on a front of confidence, but really lots of folks kind of 'fake it' or so I was told once (by a person who I always assumed was oh so confident, and they then confided in me that it was kind of an act!)

Damien

 

Hearing what others did can and likely will help. While you might not immediately identify with them, you never know until you experience it. If you read the coming out stories you often see so many different experiences, but the feelings that many of us shared through those emotional times bond us all together.

Hopefully you'll find a bit of yourself there you never knew was in you.

Good luck and let us know how it goes...

 

Thanks for sharing your story. It's always good to read how people are progressing on their journey. Best wishes for a meaningful support group!

 

It can only be a good thing to do!!
The hardest thing is the lead up to it .. But once you are there it will be great!!

 

It's a great experience. There are 2 monthly groups that I make a point to attend. One is made up mostly of supportive older people who have gay friends or relatives, and the other is more of a mix of gay and straight (and a little more intellectual as well). Both have been wonderful for helping me realize that I'm not alone and people really ARE loving and accepting. That goes a long way.

 

that's the spirit.

 

I hope you have a grand time.
I wish wish wish there were a support group for gay men in my area. I have been to 2 different gay community centers, and both said they have had no luck getting a group for gay men together. The coming out group,for lesbians are running strong.
EC has been a real blessing in the absence of a group. And I have been in contact with a couple of gay colleagues who are becoming wonderful friends. They have been so incredibly supportive, and helpful in a way that none of the straight friends I have can be. It really is wonderful not to be alone.
I hope the group goes well for you.

 

Excuse my French but CHRIST ON A CRUTCH! Did anyone call this guy out on his behaviour? How asinine can people be? I'm sorry but this would make me want to punch him in the mouth even though I hate violence and love my hands.

...breathe...

OK. Rant over.

 

Dittos.... Ugh... That is just not OK. Liked going to an alcoholics anonymous meeting and buying everyone a round of drinks. Ugh.... Perhaps finding a group closer to you would be better... Just don't let the actions of one person taint your wanting to get involved in a group closer to home.

 

Your experience was so terribly wrong. That's not support, it's public outing and shaming. People aren't all like that, but it goes to show that being gay doesn't automatically grant anyone common sense and empathy. Hell of a way to learn that lesson. (&&&)

The process of coming out can use up a lot of your emotions and energy. This is all very new to most of us. Probably all of us actually. Nothing wrong with giving yourself time to catch up. I've found that much of my progress has been sudden and crashing, followed by long periods of not much, like the pressures along a fault line that suddenly cause an earthquake and multiple aftershocks, and then long periods of calm. Nothing wrong with giving yourself time to adjust and regroup.

 

Eek!
I wonder how the other guys reacted to such behavior, I.e. did they shrug it off as that's just him, did they play into it like it is regular, or did they become uncomfortable too?

I do agree - the process of coming out is consuming, and there is something good and healthy focusing on the other needs of life.